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Sidehackers (AKA "Five the Hard Way," 1969) in the PNW

Details: Written by: Mortado; Category: The 1970s in Northwest Cinemas; Hits: 397

This is a collection of media from the initial runs of Sidehackers (AKA "Five the Hard Way," 1969) in the Pacific Northwest. This doesn't appear to have had a run in Seattle under either title.

Click on images for larger versions.

Sidehackers (AKA "Five the Hard Way," 1969)
“Sidehackers” is one of those late sixties curiosities that thinks it is tapping into the raw nerves of counterculture energy but mostly ends up looking like a sunburned shrug baked onto cheap asphalt. The film circles around motorcycle racing with a strange sidecar twist, a gimmick that is supposed to give the story its identity but mostly feels like a desperate attempt to stand out in a market already drowning in biker flicks. The racing itself has that familiar Crown International Pictures flavor: dusty tracks, engines that sound like they are coughing up their last breath, and a general sense that everyone involved is trying very hard to look tougher than they actually are.

What gives “Sidehackers” its particular grime is the way it tries to fuse macho swagger with a kind of moral melodrama. You can see the film straining to be about loyalty, betrayal, and the cost of violence, but the execution is so clumsy that the emotional beats land with all the grace of a stalled bike. The characters posture and brood, yet their motivations feel thin, as if they were scribbled on the back of a diner napkin between takes. Even the more volatile personalities, the ones meant to inject danger into the story, come off less like genuine threats and more like men who have spent too much time practicing sneers in a bathroom mirror.

There is also that unmistakable low-budget haze hanging over everything. The cinematography has a washed-out, sun-blasted look that might have been atmospheric if it felt intentional, but instead it resembles a film that simply did not have the time or money to wait for better lighting. The music tries to pump life into scenes that are otherwise limp, and the editing occasionally feels like it is trying to escape the movie altogether. You can sense the production wrestling with its own limitations, and losing.

Still, “Sidehackers” has a strange pull. Not because it is good, but because it is so earnest in its attempt to be something more than a disposable biker picture. It wants grit, tragedy, and intensity, but what it delivers is a kind of accidental bleakness, the sort that comes from watching people chase meaning in a story that never quite finds any. The film is a relic of a moment when exploitation cinema was convinced it could tap into the anxieties of the era simply by throwing motorcycles, violence, and wounded pride at the screen. Sometimes that worked. Here, it mostly sputters.

Director: Gus Trikonis
Writers: Tony Huston, Larry Billman
Stars: Ross Hagen, Diane McBain, Michael Pataki

March 10, 1970 ad (Portland)

March 11, 1970 ad (Portland)

March 12, 1970 ad (Portland)

March 13, 1970 ad (Portland)

Sidehackers (1969) poster

A Bullet for Pretty Boy (1970) in the PNW

Details: Written by: Mortado; Category: The 1970s in Northwest Cinemas; Hits: 413

This is a collection of media from the initial runs of "A Bullet for Pretty Boy" (1970) in the Pacific Northwest. "Bloody Mama" was back as the second feature.

Click on images for larger versions.

A Bullet for Pretty Boy (1970)
“A Bullet for Pretty Boy” is one of those scrappy seventies outlaw dramas that pretends to be a character study while mostly reveling in its own grit. It takes the familiar American myth of the charming criminal and drags it through a world that feels worn down, cheap, and vaguely exhausted with the idea of heroism. The film keeps its distance from any romantic gloss, instead presenting its central figure as a man pushed along by bad luck, worse choices, and the kind of restless pride that never leads anywhere good. There is a sense that everyone in this story already knows how it will end, but they keep moving anyway because stopping would mean admitting the whole thing was pointless from the start.

The production has that unmistakable drive in look, where the dust on the costumes and the sweat on the actors seem more honest than the dialogue. It is a film that never quite trusts its own attempts at glamour, and that tension gives it a strange appeal. You can feel the filmmakers trying to elevate the material while the material keeps sinking back into the mud. The violence is framed less as spectacle and more as a grim inevitability, the kind that creeps in when people convince themselves they deserve more than the world is willing to give.

What stands out most is the atmosphere of resignation. “A Bullet for Pretty Boy” is not interested in celebrating rebellion or outlaw swagger. It treats ambition like a curse and charm like a flimsy shield against the consequences waiting around the corner. The film moves with a rough energy, but underneath that is a quiet cynicism about the American fascination with men who run from their problems and call it freedom. It is a story about someone who keeps trying to outrun the truth of who he is, and the film never lets you forget how futile that chase really feels.

Directors: Larry Buchanan, Maury Dexter
Writers: Tony Huston, Larry Buchanan, Henry Rosenbaum
Stars: Fabian, Jocelyn Lane, Astrid Warner

August 25, 1970 ad (Portland)